Single man’s home. All the decisions were taking following his requests. This is an interior that works for him and his life style.
We are living in a time where freedom is being more and more appreciated: The freedom to be what you want to be and who you want to be.
When it comes to relationships the freedom of enjoying your singlehood or aiming to find your other half (with marriage in mind) has achieved new standards of acceptance, hence, new protocols.
Choosing singlehood is not being perceived as a “failure” in the making of your life anymore but a valid option, one that involves taking decisions thinking just of you, even when you may have a “romantic” or “pragmatic” relation.
Now, How this affect your home? How does this affect the way you create the place where you live?
If you take the conscious decision that marriage is not for you either because you prefer to be single or don’t see yourself attached to anybody in a long term relationship my suggestion is that you create your home yourself, following the advice of a friend, or hiring an interior designer. DO NOT get a “partner” involved.
Why?
Because it is in consistent with your choice of life, it is YOUR home; because is less expensive and because it avoids unnecessary discussions with your temporary partner and the ones to come!.
Let me explain…
For some having a couple implies a certain level of “ownership” where the more the other person “marks his/her territory” the more public the statement of ownership is.
So if she or he helps you to design your place, that is a big statement and a warning for all those that visit your place that you don’t belong to yourself completely. You gave her or him the permission for shaping your home with all the implications involved.
Now imagine you finish the relationship with that person and the next one stays with you now and then. Every time that she or he asks you about that colour, that painting, that sofa, it brings the ex into the conversation, which is not always a good thing. So either you change the interior design, or you just ignore the point, not a good idea I would say.
So if you life if singlehood keep it simple and remember your home is YOUR HOME.
If you are more in love with the idea of a relationship, and where marriage is the ultimate goal, giving carte blanche to your partner to help you to design your place, or working together on it, certainly increases the possibility of reinforcing the relationship and taking it to the next level.
I think both options are valid.
Family home. She wanted a TV in the living room, he did not. When one works for a couple or family it is very important to try to get the balance right. In this case it was achieved as I proposed a lift mechanism that hides the TV if not in use with an art work. She was happy as he was. In a marriage it is about balance, both points of view has to be listen as much as possible.
I have seen friends, clients, etc unhappy of how the other person is taking over their space and life when what they want is just a lover not a fiancé.
As everything transparency and taking the right actions will help you to find the right match for you.
Be happy at your home is a right that all of us have.
